The Bran Report

It's good for parts of you that you'd probably rather not think about.

Friday, April 06, 2007

Coincidence- or is it?

I just got back from nine hours of writing down things like "McV Hobnobs 300g 79pm +MkCh119pm". I helped close tonight and will be opening tomorrow. My pay remains at it's Not-Even-In-Kansas legality.

The staff of Durham's admissions office are still taking advantage of the unseasonal warmth by running around chasing butterlfies outside in the sunshine and NOT SENDING ME LETTERS.

A sore has developed inside my lower lip. It painfully bashes into my right lower incisor unless I adopt an expression that is dour and petulant. I assume that it is the result of an excess of joy in my body.

Oh Noes

I just listened to a Bright Eyes track on the radio and really liked it. Does this mean I have to start growing my hair long so thatg I can comb it over my eyes?

Edit: Phew! I heard another one and hated it. Back to my monastic haircut and Sir Thomas Moore clothing.

Wednesday, April 04, 2007


I have discovered something about myself. Some feature of the way my brain works makes it impossible for me to deal with any of the following...

Microsoft Office Assistant

...without emitting a Wilhelm.

"We're sorry, but a customer already has that email address". IT'S MY EMAIL ADDRESS. I KNOW YOU ARE LYING. WHY DO YOU DO THIS TO ME?